A sad day :(

 

Say what you want about him; perhaps in his latter years he turned into a piece of shit, perhaps not. Either way, he definitely made some bad decisions. But he was also an INCREDIBLE entertainer. It saddens me that a childhood hero of mine has passed at such a young age without being even slightly vindicated in the world's eyes. Talk about a fall from grace. I talked my share of smack, but I'll truly miss u, Michael.

Another great one bites the dust

Naughty, buxom, supersexy post-WWII pinup girl & stag film star Bettie Page has died. She definitely left a legacy behind her. The woman is a legend. Man, imagine all the monkeys that have been spanked to her iconic images over the last 60 years... She definitely did her part to usher in the sexual revolution.

R.I.P. Bettie Page. Your body has passed, but the fantasy of your flesh lives on, forever young.

A couple of things are on my mind this morning

Okay, first off: did you know Dec 7-13 is National Handwashing Awareness Week? Please observe and teach your children proper handwashing techniques. What? Soap and water? Hell no, it's not that simple! Listen, you've got to count to twenty, scrub under your nails... It's a very complicated affair. Aw, fer cryin' out loud, just let Henry the Hand explain it!

Now, on to a movie review; something new for me. I rented and watched The Dark Knight last night... What's the big deal about this movie? Maybe I was expecting too much, but I thought it was too long, choppy in places with plot holes, and just overall a fairly good movie, but nowhere near as good as Batman Begins or even the original Batman.

For instance, how the hell did the Joker get out of police custody? He was in the interrogation cell with that cop, who was about to beat the crap out of him, then suddenly he was out of the cell with a knife to the guy's throat. What happened in between seems pretty important to me.

And way before that, there was the first scene when Joker was telling his scar story. He's got a knife to someone's mouth and just as he's about to cut, he drops the body instead. And the guy's already dead. Seems like there was a scene cut there or something, perhaps to attain a PG13? I thought the DVD had skipped, except I didn't get my usual "SKIPPING OVER DAMAGED AREA" notice on the MacBook screen.

Now, my first example I can explain away as having to do with Ledger's death. Perhaps they just hadn't gotten around to finishing that scene. I suppose a little choppiness is to be expected, and thus is forgiveable. To a point.

However, the second scene could have been done as a closeup gross-out scene. That would undoubtedly have pushed it to an R rating, but I think the film suffered for its exclusion. There's all this tension built up in that scene, and then it just falls flat, literally, without that explosive release. What a letdown.

And Joker escapes time and again from the clutches of the Bat and police. How did he get out of Wayne's fundraiser? We don't know. The list goes on.

Let's not forget the death of Harvey Dent. I just don't understand the idea of introducing a kickass character like that and offing him in the same movie. For me, this was like the premature demise of the most kickass Sith Lord ever, Darth Maul. I wanted to see that sumbitch wipe the floor with Jedis for another two movies. It's such an anticlimax to see a seriously evil dude get killed so soon. I'd hoped they were setting up Two-Face to be a key player in the next film.

How the hell does Batman fly... sorry, "glide" like that? Was it in the other movie & I just don't remember it? Was the movie too dark to see it?

And apparently, placing some kind of a super-strong bat-cable across the road in front of an oncoming semi trailer is enough to transfer its forward momentum into enough upward momentum to flip it end-over end! WTF?!?! Those damn movie physics...

Rant, rant, rant. Sorry. I know, I know. I expect too much. But, just like I enjoy a kung fu movie as long as there's no wire work, I like a good action shoot 'em up, as long as there is some grounding in basic reality, like the laws of physics (gravity, momentum, space-time continuum). Even for a comic book movie. When you do more than bend one of these laws for effect, you're now making a science fiction movie, and the suspension of that law should be the latest plot point. Batman should have stood there and said, "Holy shit. That semi just flipped over. That was weird. I just hoped to slow it down, but that just plain shouldn't have happened. At all. Not on this planet, anyway." Then he'd realize he was levitating three feet off the ground.

But I digress. My review: Maybe rent it if you haven't seen it. But don't buy it. If you have seen it, watch Batman Begins again instead. Or American Psycho for an even better Christian Bale movie. And one more thing. To the Academy: Please don't give Ledger a silly posthumous Oscar. His performance was good, but not Oscar-worthy.

But these are just my opinions. Have a great Christmas everyone.

Happenin's

Hooray for me! I just successfully installed my first wireless router. My new home is finally wireless, at least for Internet purposes. Too bad I had to discover a leaky roof today as well. DAMN YOU, GUSTAV! Oh well, at least this way I know about it and can get it fixed.

Man, home is startin' to come together: wireless web surfing from any location, the kids have a playroom in the basement that can keep them out of our hair when we need alone time, DVRs connected to every TV... I watched Metalocalypse in the kitchen today while I cooked lunch, fer cryin' out loud! How cool is that?

Now, to finish unpacking the rest of these damned boxes...

Cleanliness is next to godliness

My wife, Heather, called me at work today and said, "I'm at Target and this monk just walked in." Of course I asked her how the rest of the joke went; was he was alone, or did a priest and rabbi walk in with him?

I also asked if he was carrying around a wooden plank, and if so, how was he pushing his shopping cart. (pie jesu domine, dona eis requiem -SMACK-)

We determined on the phone that it was a legit monk and not a dude in a Ruby's Halloween costume, though we decided he could just as easily have been a friar because we don't know the difference. They seem to have the same uniform.

Then we wondered what exactly a monk would buy at Target, so she kept an eye out for him or followed him around or something. I don't know. We joked about the things he could buy that would be most entertaining, condoms being on the top of the list. Also, sneakers, sandals, razors, rope, a bell, a bookmark, candles, you get the idea.

How does a monk get to Target, anyway? Is there a monastery anywhere near Peoria? I pictured him thumbing a lift from some Amish folk in a wagon. LOL.

Heather called me back after a bit. "A mop, a toilet brush, and Pine-Sol." Well, whaddaya know. They have indoor plumbing at the dirty monkery.

Summer vacation 2008, part 5

Thursday:

We waken around 7:00 and all get up and dressed. We begin gathering our stuff and I go grab the van so we can hop right in after breakfast. All five of us go to the dining room and have some grub. After breakfast, Ashley, Calliope, Brandon & I hit the miniature golf course while Heather goes to get her fired pottery. Brandon whoops me at mini golf.

After the game, everyone piles into the van & it's off to Swansea. A couple hours later, we're at Heather's parents' house & trading vans again so we can take our newly repaired van home. Of course, though, it doesn't start. I stick the battery on the charger for 90 minutes or so, and we eventually get it started. Heather takes the van to NTB and replaces the battery. Then, we have dinner at Outback with Sharon & the little kids beg to stay a couple more days.

We go along with it and leave Ash & Calliope there with Nana. After a brief trip to the newest metro east Target store, in Swansea, Brandon, Heather & I head home. We finally arrive around 10:30pm and head STRAIGHT to bed. Exhausted!

Summer vacation 2008, part 4

Wednesday:

Today is the day we pick up Ashley from minicamp! We miss him and can't wait to see him, and Calliope has even said she misses him.

We rise at the typical 6:30 or so, take our time getting around and ready for breakfast, and eventually make it to the dining hall about 8:00. For breakfast, I set my sights on bacon, eggs, toast and oatmeal with cinnamon and honey. Milk to drink, as always. Yum.

After eating, Brandon & I take Calliope to her Adventurer Camp, where we learn she will have playmates today. Three other kids are attending this time (she was all alone on Monday). While we take care of that, Heather arranges for us to stay an additional night, so we can do some stuff with Ashley. Afterward, we head over to the Arts & Crafts building so Heather can finish her pottery. While she works on that, Brandon & I shoot some hoops. Once Heather is done, I run up to the parking lot to grab the van & the three of us go to Camp Lakewood to get Ash.

When we open the cabin door, he's hiding under a bed. He's one of the last two boys in his group to be claimed. We give hugs and kisses, see lots of smiles and hear about all kinds of cool stuff he did. After chatting with the counselors a bit, we gather up the last of his stuff and pack into the van. We decide to make a stop at the Trading Post to burn up the rest of his account there (and spend a bit more as well). We get Nerf-type slingshot missiles for Ash and Calliope, as well as a squishy Koosh ball for each. He also gets a Lakewood tee shirt and Brandon and I get a pair of those blaster balls that explode when you smack 'em together.

Back to the room, and we get Ashley a shower (he hasn't had one since Monday) and get cleaned up to grab sissy and go to lunch. I have ham & turkey sandwich with white American on Rye, salad and a couple of chicken rings. After lunch, the kids go down for a nap and Brandon & I take some down-time outside on the dock near our room. We sit and practice the Jew's Harp for an hour or so, goof around on video tape, then take a walk so I can snap some nature photos. It's a gorgeous day, a bit overcast, so the sun's not killing us. Swimming later will be nice since it's not extremely hot like it's been the past couple days.

After nap, at 2:00, comes the rocketry class we signed up for. We build four rockets and walk down past the tennis courts to launch them at 3:00. My nosecone and Heather's stay attached, but Ashley's and Brandon's blow completely off. Fun time.

Next, we gather laundry (especially Ashley's smelly camp duds) to take to the on-site laundry facility. While Heather gets that started, Brandon, Ash & I have an archery appointment. Calliope comes along to watch.

First round, Brandon hits the target a few times, I hit three of five, and Ash (with the help of the instructor) misses completely. Ashley gets to try again, since there are only two lefties in the group, and he gets closer, again with the instructor's help. Next time up, I adjust my aiming technique and manage to hit the target all five times, even getting two bullseyes. Brandon does about the same. By the last go round, I get four of five bullseyes, with one being in the next ring out, Ashley hits the target TWO TIMES (boy, is he HAPPY!), and Brandon is hunting in the woods behind the targets for a couple of his arrows. LOL.

After finishing our final activity, it's about 5:00. We reconnect with Heather and go to the lodge for dinner. Afterward, it's down to the beach with all of us. There's not a soul in sight, other than lifeguards. I guess right after or during dinner is not a prime swimming time slot. We spend a good hour or so swimming & Ash even goes down the little slide into the water a couple times. Just as we decide get out & run over to the Country Store for some ice cream, an enormous horsefly chases us out of the water. It's freakin' hilarious to watch.

While the rest of the family eat their cones, I retrieve our clean laundry from the on-site facility. Then, it's off to our room for showers, jammies & bedtime for all, even me. Another awesome day. One morning left to go, then it's back to work on Friday.

Summer vacation 2008, part 3

Tuesday:

We wake up this morning around 6:30, as usual. Everyone gets dressed and I bring some clothes in that we had set outside wet, to dry. We gather the dirty clothes together in bags, so we can take them into town to launder today. It is to be an adventure day today, with spontaneous activities instead of planned ones. Well, except for the pony ride. That comes after breakfast.

So we head down to breakfast at our usual 8am. I go for two sausage patties, a scoop of scrambled eggs, two biscuits (one covered with gravy) some OJ and milk. Yummilicious. Then, it's off to the Triangle-Y Ranch for Calliope's pony ride. Whee! Fun! Done.

After the ride, the plan is to head out to the Berryman Trail to see if we can find Heather's old Lakewood stamping grounds, in particular a stretch of creek that she used to stop at during horse overnights, and a general store they used to go to as well when she was a little camper herself. As we were about to leave the ranch, Heather spots Ashley with his camp group, playing in a stream over the hill from the ranch. We park the van and run across the road to hide behind a line of trees and watch him to see if he's having fun. I bring the video camera.

They are playing a game where one of the counselors is apparently a monster called "Crawdad," who like to kidnap children and take them down- or upstream. To quell his hunger for child flesh, they must all band together and beat him silly with pool noodles, while he throatily chants "Crawdad, Crawdad, Crawdad!" Ash is having fun. He's wearing his camouflage jammies for some reason, but he's smiling and having a good time. It makes me happy, but makes me miss him even more. I can't wait to see him again tomorrow. He's gonna be so grown up. Hope he doesn't greet us carrying a cigar and a snifter of brandy: "Hello mother. Good to see you again, father. How've you been?"

So we go for a drive, kinda blindly, through Mark Twain National Forest, looking for a specific but unnamed creek. It's kinda like looking for a needle in a needle stack. A good hour later, the immediate goal becomes getting out of the park and figuring out how to get back to Potosi so we can do our laundry and grab some lunch. By 1:00 or so, we make it back to town and stop at the laundromat to get some clothes in the wash.

Leaving the clothes there to launder, we run to Taco Hell for lunch, hoping it will be better than it is in Illinois. Not really any different. Oh well. Haven't had it in ages, so it was still kinda nice even though it was sucky. So we go back to put our stuff in dryers, then leave it there again & run to Walmart to return a shitty watch Heather got me a couple days ago.

Once we get back to the laundromat, of course only half of it is dry, so we pull out what's done, restart the rest, and run to gas up the van, cuz it's only $3.49 per gallon here. After the gas, we are able to retrieve the rest of the laundry and try one more time for the creek and general store.

We do find a general store that may or may not have been the right one, but Heather talks to the attendant and is told that the creek she's looking for is probably right up the road. She tells Heather as she leaves the store, "I hope you find your memories."

We drive down the gravel road she directs us to, and we find a kickass stream. Brandon, Calliope, Heather & I climb down the bank and hop in up to our ankles. We make our way along with the current and find an honest-to-gosh swimmin' hole, rope swing and all. Calliope has her bathing suit on, but the rest of us give in to the urge and hop in wearing our clothes. Wow. What a memorable experience. I am sooooooo glad we did this today.

Brandon swings out a few times and plops in the stream. Heather and Brandon float on their backs and have a race downstream. Calliope and I chuck rocks into the creek and swim around in the shallower bits. This may not be the right stream, or at least not the right area of the right stream, but it's definitely a fantastic find. It's hard to say how long we stay there, but it's at least an hour.

I feel the urge to take off, so we can get back for dinner, so we take off just as another family is showing up to our "secret swimming hole." Ten minutes after we leave, the rain starts. We get back to our room & unpack the clean clothes in enough time for dinner. I get chicken pot pie and green beans, lots of water again, and celery with peanut butter for dessert. After eating, we manage to beat the storm back to the Arts & Crafts building, where Heather plans to finish her mug. However, they are closed, so we decide to go to a barn dance instead.

The dance is fun. Heather & I do the Electric Slide & three or four other country line dances, the kids join in for the Hokey Pokey and the Chicken Dance, and we finish with the Cha-Cha Slide. When we leave, it's about 8:30 and the storm is in full force. Instead of going right to our room, we grab a couple of games at the front desk and take them to a lounge for all of us to play.

Calliope, Brandon & I play "Lucky Ducks" while Heather runs to the room to get our snacks. Upon her return, Heather, Brandon & I play Boggle for six rounds while Calliope draws a picture. I win. 54 to 43 to 21. Boo-ya!

Finally, back to the room for beddy-bye. And here I am, last one standing, at 11:30 pm, wrapping up this chapter of my blog for you. Done now til Part IV. Talk to you tomorrow.

Summer vacation 2008, part 2

Monday:

Up at 6:30, and I take a few pics of the sun on Lake Sunnen. We need to kill some time before our scheduled breakfast, and I decide to do some blogging. Thus is born Part I. We head down to breakfast a bit later-- for me, French toast, cheesy omelet, hash brown casserole, milk and cappuccino.

After breakfast, we all take Calliope to Explorer Camp (shhh- it's for 4 and up). She's the only little explorer today. One of the counselors is Daniel from last night's Musical Canoe adventure. Then, Brandon & I have the Alpine Tower to conquer at 9:30am. A three-sided tower with all the choices in the world as far as how you climb. We climb simultaneously, but I reach the first platform first, about 20 feet up. Brandon chose climbing up the side of the inclined cargo net- pretty hard. I wait for him a bit, then begin my climb up the inclined telephone pole with rock wall holds. Then I get to a straight vertical pole & have to climb up it. My muscles begin burning and my fear of heights is REALLY nagging me. I make it to about 40 feet and perch myself on a single cable, hugging my telephone pole to save my life.
Brandon hasn't really left the platform yet, my muscles are spent, and I realize I'm not gonna make it to the top. I wait it out a few minutes as Brandon climbs below me, but it's no use. I have to rappel down.
Brandon continues his climb and eventually makes it to where I was. I snap photos from the ground of his ascent. From there, he stutters, but keeps on truckin' all the way to the top. 50 FEET UP! Wow! Nice job, dude!

Only 10:00, and already it's HOT! We are drenched in sweat. We go back to the room to rest a bit & I practice my Jew's Harp a little. Brandon goes swimming for a little while, but I'm not movin'. Heather has run into town to get some more supplies, so Brandon & I chill a bit & check out some YouTube vids.

Once Heather gets back, we all go get Calliope and head to lunch. I have two bowls of chili and some milk. Then, it's off to Arts & Crafts to paint some pottery. Calliope makes the ugliest damned ice cream cone I have ever seen. Black ice cream? Really? Yuck. I go for a tiny chiminea, Brandon paints a monkey, and Heather begins work on an enormous mug.
We run out of time, because Brandon & I have the Summit Zip at 2:00. Heather is the only one not finished, so she places hers on the "unfinished" rack and we go back. Brandon & I do our afternoon zipline & then some rifle shootin' while Calliope lies down for a nap & Heathehr hangs out in the room.

Zipline was cooler this time vs. two years ago, cuz we got to race. They put in a parallel zip. So I climb up first, then wait for Brandon. We sit next to one another on the platform. It's FRICKIN' HOT! 3, 2, 1, Go! 30 feet up, 500 feet long. Awesome run, and Brandon wins. We get it done just in time, because at that point they begin shutting down the more strenuous activities due to the heat. The temperature today reaches 102, with a heat index of 116. Luckily, we have a less strenuous activity scheduled next- riflery.

So we drive partway down and walk the rest of the way to the rifle range. We take the second round for our turn and take a seat at the guns. It's hot, man. I have my glasses off and the safety glasses on, plus we have our ear protection-headphone-thingies on & the sweat is dripping down into our eyes while the goggles fog up from the inside. Aiming carefully, we let fly with our guns. Brandon hits the target all five times, including one bullseye. I manage all five bullseyes (again, just like two years ago), with two in the same hole, Robin Hood-style. Found something I'm evidently good at, despite the shitty vision. Perhaps I should hit the firing range sometime.

Brandon & I make our way back to the room where Calliope is still napping. We regale Heather with tales of our exploits & chill out for a bit. Once Calliope wakes, we all go out to the beach. Calliope & I build a sand castle and we all do some lake swimming. As it nears dinner time, we start to head in. We gather our stuff and come in for showers before going up to dinner.

I have a big salad with cottage cheese, chicken 'n dumplings, tater tots and corn, with Mountain Dew to drink. After mealtime, which of course was delicious, we come back to the room and pop "Robots" in the Mac, lie on the beds & kinda let Calliope have the run of things for a while. Come 9:00, Brandon & I head out for our final event of the day, the Moonlight Zip.
We go in a group of about 15 on a dark hike about 100 yards into the woods, to the site of a zipline. Here's the deal: You hook in, take off running down a pitch-black hill, and eventually the ground disappears out from under you. You zip over a valley for about 300 feet and rise up on the zip cable. Your only illumination is the stars in the sky, through the treetop canopy. Gravity brings you back down the line to your starting hill, where you go to the top and then run down to do the same thing over again. Three times each. Very cool, very enjoyable, worth the 90 minutes and $20 each we invested in it.

Then, back to the room where the girls are in bed. We take turns showering (still friggin' hot as hell out there) and hit the sack. Aaaahhhh......

Summer vacation 2008, part 1

Saturday:
Leave Peoria and head to Belleville to visit with Heather's parents. Get some work done on the van while we're there (since like the ONLY mechanic we trust lives there. -- FOSTER'S AUTOMOTIVE -- They do GREAT work.)
Have dinner with her folks that evening at Hometown Buffet in Fairview Heights. Tolerable food, as usual. Heather & the kids are in bed that night by 8:30. Brandon & I stay up shooting the breeze another hour.

Sunday:
Get up at 4am after a crappy sleepless night. Bed sucks, pillow sucks, hot as hell in that room of the house, cat hair in the air, ACHOO! Get the family in the van & leave around 5am for Missouri. Stop at 6:00 for breakfast at the Waffle House- YUM. We try to get breakfast there at least every other time we come down here.
Back on the road. Arrive at Trout Lodge in Potosi, MO around 9:00. We can't check in yet, so we pre-register and head to the Country Store to schedule our events. First event: Summit Cilmb & Rappel. Brandon & I begin gearing up at 10:00. Brandon goes first. Here are the details:
1. Climb 15 feet up a telephone pole to an attached log. Walk up the log, which is inclined, about 25 feet log with a rise of maybe an additional 5 feet, to another pole.
2. Hook into a new safety line, off the belay, and cross 20 feet to the next pole, walking across two WOBBLY cables (20 feet up, remember). It's called "Tired Two Legs."
3. Hook into a new safety line and cross about 10 feet on two parallel 2x6's, edge up.
4. Hook into a belay line & climb the next telephone pole an additional 10 feet up to cross a vertical rope 'X' that's about 20 feet long. The top rope & bottom rope cross in the center, where the top becomes the bottom & vice versa.
5. Off belay, on new safety line. Climb into the center of a rope web & rappel down thru the center from 30 feet.
Brandon does great. I... cheat, kinda. On "Tired Two Legs," I just decide to leap off the pole and see how far my body weight and momentum can carry me before I have to use my legs. I make it 3/4 of the way, then finish strong.
For step 4, I begin climbing out on the rope with my eyes closed, then about 4 feet out decide to go for the leap again. I pull myself along with the top rope until I can use both ropes again comfortably. Screw that stupid 'X'.
After that, lunch. Fried chicken, roast beef, mac n cheese, mashed taters, green beans, LOTS OF WATER.
Then we all go tie-dye some tee shirts together. Lots of fun and we all did a different pattern. After that, it's time to take Ashley to register for his overnight camp at YMCA Camp Lakewood. We get him to his cabin to meet his three counselors- Schizo, Violet and Mischief. I make up Ashley's bed and we get him all settled & give hugs & kisses & take off back to Trout Lodge.
Brandon, Heather, Calliope & I make a run to WalMart for supplies & then come back, register for new events at the Country Store. After that, we come back to the lodge & get checked in to our room, where we unpack. Soon after comes dinner. Yum. I love the food here. I have baked pollack filets with curry rice and taters au gratin with iced tea.
The four of us hop in a canoe after dinner & row across the lake to campfire, where we sing songs along with a guitar-toting Aussie camp counselor. On the last ditty, "Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)," I whip out my Jew Harp and twang along. Lots of grins round the fire.
Back to the room, where Heather & Calliope shower. Brandon & I head out for a moonlight hike at 9pm, for an hour. When we get back, a quick snack of trail mix, plus a shower, then... BED! Finally! What a fantastic day, though.

More to come.

Happy Pi Day!

What better day to celebrate that most elusive and mysterious of irrational numbers than on 3/14? Sure, you could think of Pi as simply a circle’s circumference divided by its diameter, but it’s so much more than that. That alone is crazy enough, since in a "perfect" circle, circ/diam will NEVER be anything other than 3.14yadayada..... Pi wouldn’t be as amazing if it were a whole number. We wouldn’t be nearly as amazed to see it recurring in nature if it were simply "3." Big deal.

Okay, I realize most folks don’t share my enthusiasm for mathematical wonders, so I’ll move on, but let me suggest some reading first. To learn a BIT more about Pi and Pi Day, see this article. Or, to be amazed on a deeper level about not just Pi, but the equally if not more amazing Phi, or the "Golden Ratio," check out this book. I own it and love it.

Alright, enough of that for the day. But I would like to know why the blog categories in the drop-down menu during blog creation lack something like "Science and Nature." I’m sure I’m not the first geek to write about something other than "Parties and Nightlife." Get on that, Tom! Someboody send him an email, because Tom is not my friend.

Re: Vatican releases new list of sins

Those crazy fuckers at the Vatican are at it again:

__________________________________________________________________________________

Monday, Mar. 10, 2008 By AP

(VATICAN CITY) — A Vatican official has listed drugs, pollution, genetic manipulation and social and economic injustices as new areas of sinful behavior.

Sins increasingly manifest themselves as behavior that damages society as a whole, Monsignor Gianfranco Girotti said in an interview published Sunday by the Vatican's daily newspaper, L'Osservatore Romano.

"While sin used to concern mostly the individual, today it has mainly a social resonance, due to the phenomenon of globalization," said Girotti, who heads the Apostolic Penitentiary, a Vatican body that issues decisions on matters of conscience and grants absolutions.

Catholic teaching distinguishes between lesser venial sins and mortal sins.

Listing the new areas of sinful behavior, Girotti denounced "certain violations of the fundamental rights of human nature through experiments, genetic manipulations."

He also mentioned drugs — which "weaken the mind and obscure intelligence" — pollution, and the widening social and economic differences between the rich and the poor.

Girotti said the Catholic Church continued to be concerned by other sinful acts, including abortion and pedophilia.

He said Church authorities had reacted with "rigorous measures" to child abuse scandals within the clergy, but he also claimed that the issue had been excessively emphasized by the media. 

_________________________________________________________________________________

What? Drugs? Like... wine? Doesn't it "weaken the mind and obscure intelligence"? Yeah, right, I really believe the Cathoholic Church is going to admit that alcohol is a drug--the most widely used psychoactive drug in the world, in fact. That'll be the day. Yet again, the church shows us its hypocrisy and knack for inconsistency.

And, "thy shall not POLLUTE THY ATMOSPHERE???" What the hell?! These guys just keep on making shit up, don't they? If their book is so damned holy and perfect, why do they have to keep issuing addenda to it? They've even redefined the meaning of "sin." Here I always thought it meant "to fall short of the mark; miss; err." Now they tell me it has to do with global-social responsibilities. I'm sorry, was that the King James or NIV that says we need to reduce our carbon footprint to get into heaven?

Hooray! Back to work for the WGA!

This means I'll get more episodes of LOST! ...And maybe Carlton & Damon will return to their podcast now?

Don't know the terms of their agreement, but I'm glad they reconciled. Although, I was starting to think it might be an interesting world if the WGA had been told to take a hike.

Imagine... A nation where novice writers control our entertainment and foreign films are suddenly number one at the box office. DVD sales go through the roof as people scramble to purchase the movies they love, because all the good stuff has already been made. The WGA members are blacklisted and are relegated to writing novels, black market scripts and novelizations of the rubbish the scabs send to the big screen. TV is only reality and reruns. MTV has to go back to showing music videos. Cats and dogs living together. Real "wrath of God"-type stuff. Apologies (but no royalties) to Mr. Aykroyd and Mr. Ramis.

Anyway, all I care about is that they finally end Prison Break and LOST with an actual finale that ties up all the loose ends. I know LOST will be another few seasons, but PLEASE, Fox, PLEASE end Prison Break next season. I don't think I can take much more of this on-the-edge-of-my-seat-cliffhanger-abuse. This has GOT to be the most suspenseful show on TV, ever! Seriously, let's end it while it's still good. I really don't want to see one of my favorite shows jump the shark. Kill it before you're tempted to air "tonight, on a very special Prison Break..."

Changing the Constitution?

At one point I had made a resolution to myself that I would post at least one new blog a week. My wife, Heather, always said I was a good writer, and what better way to improve than with practice. Well, I've fallen short of my goal recently, even going so far as to dig up old shit I can throw on here instead of coming up with something fresh, and still feel like I was keeping my promise. But I knew I was cheating. To that end, I will now renew my vow afresh.

I could blame my lack of blogging enthusiasm lately on all the shit that's been going on lately at home & work. Heather's been ill, we've made trips, big plans for the marriage vow renewal & all, taking on new responsibilities at work, etc. In fact, I will blame it on all that.

There's plenty of crap in the news going on to blog about. Good grief, the road to the White House alone is paved with idiocy and unconstitutional effrontery. Let's begin there.

Mike Huckabee... What can be said? In his own words, he said he wants the Constitution changed to reflect the laws of God. He was referring in particular to defining "marriage" in the Constitution as a bond between "one man and one woman." Did he forget about all the polygamy in the Bible? It was championed in the Old Testament! Howe many wives did King Solomon have? 1000? King David? At least 18. Good old "Father" Abraham? At least three. In its silence about such situations, which are NUMEROUS in the Bible, the Book endorses polygamy.

Not only does the Bible seem to support polygamy in the Old Testament, but Jesus made it clear in Matthew 5:17-18 that everything set forth in the Old Testament still stands in the New Testament. "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished."

But that's not my problem with Mr. Huckabee. And of course he isn't railing against the rapid spread of polygamy either. He wants, of course, like Bush before him, to put an end once and for all in this country to the notion of gay marriage. But I'm sure there's a more broad intention as well, across all prevailing issues. I can't believe that someone aspiring to the highest seat in the nation would so blatantly voice his desire to violate the establishment clause. I know I don't need to explain the separation of church and state to my readers. "Congress shall make no law..." Mr. Huckabee needs to figure out how to reconcile his faith with the best interests of the "free" people of this country. Last I checked, we were free to make decisions in our own lives. My country cannot tell me who I can and can't love or choose to live my life with in a committed relationship.

And don't even get me started on that douchebag Alan Keyes. Glad he's not even a contender.

Yes, Internet, there is a Santa Claus

Santa Claus is Coming to Town -- for 34 Microseconds

After reading this new item, I'm gonna have to stick up for the fat man here. Santa obviously has some method of travel we don't know about. It's not just reindeer. The speed this article suggests is over 100 times the speed of light. The theory of relativity (which is more than just a theory, after all) doesn't allow for such speeds to exist. I don't know how this article could categorize such speeds as "supersonic" when in fact they are superluminal.

So, Santa has obviously gotten hold of some sort of teleportation device, right? Because linear travel is not possible at those speeds. Oh, but he'd still only have a second or two to get down the chimney, set out the toys, eat the cookies, and back to the sleigh? Um... Okay. Time travel, then.

Santa has built a time machine. Duh. The reindeer are not really a means of propulsion so much as a means of power. The pounding of eight reindeer's hooves is converted to energy and then stored up until Santa had the required 1.21 gigawatts of power needed to send him BACK... TO THE FUTURE! Or wherever-- make that whenever-- else he needs to go. Unless it's some sort of a time machine that can also travel relative dimensions in space... (hmm...)

Or perhaps he IS really traveling at a hyperluminal speed and he's found a way around physics. A loophole of some sort. Maybe Einstein and company are all wrong. Perhaps another draft of relativity should be undertaken. Maybe Santa's from outer space. Maybe he cloned himself. That's how he reproduces elves, isn't it? I don't know, but, dammit, he's real! I know my wife wraps the presents & we put them out together. I know I'm the one who eats the cookies & drinks the milk. I know these things. But it's hard to not believe in Santa. Screw the scientists and the naysayers. I have faith in him, so he must be real!

Okay, you got me. I give up. Maybe he's just a symbol. Maybe he helps us feel better about ourselves. Maybe he helps us treat others better this time of year, inspiring feelings of generosity and togetherness. Maybe it's just comforting to think there's someone up there-- North, I mean-- who cares about us and rewards us when we're good. And of course it's an exclusivity thing for us, too, because God, er, Santa doesn't care about or reward people other than Christians or Capitalists. We're the chosen few. Damn, it's good to be chosen. I think I'll keep the blinders on and enjoy my holiday the way I want to. After all, it's not like it's a religion or cult or anything. Who's it gonna hurt?

A rant regarding religion

OK, about the Teddy Bear teacher in Sudan... What the hell? These Islamic idiots are putting an innocent lady in a prison that's over 5 times its capacity? All for naming a toy Muhammad? Shouldn't the extreme overcrowding be an indicator that they JAIL way too many people for stupid shit like this? I'm sure that won't come off the way it's meant, cuz all they have to do in response is start killing moonshiners instead of jailing them. That's not what I mean. What I'm saying is: YOU HAVE TOO MANY STUPID LAWS!

So naming a Teddy Bear after your precious prophet is an insult? But it was good enough for President Roosevelt! He no doubt took great joy in being associated with a beloved childhood icon. You know what? SCREW your precious Muhammad! And I'm not talking about the stinkin' bear!

Now, I'm sure there are people of Muslim faith who are very sensible. But the problem is, when you think about it, the fundamentalists are really the ones in each religion who preach and practice the TRUE faith. The fundies are the ones that get all the bad press, but they are the ones who usually take EVERY WORD in their holy scriptures as LITERAL GOSPEL. Offshoots and watered-down versions of the faith are some of the people who take the positive parts and leave the negative. I know plenty of Christians who do not judge people, teach that God loves everyone, gay or straight, black or white, those who marry outside their race, powerful women who stand on equal ground with men, etc. But many of these things I was taught were abominations in the eyes of God. Or at least frowned upon.

If you're not going to buy into the whole book, why buy into any of it? You can't in one breath tell me that the Holy Bible is the word of almighty God and then turn around and ignore the parts you don't like. That's hypocritical. And it tells me that even YOU don't believe it! You can't honestly believe in the veracity of a document as a whole without believing wholeheartedly in each individual point contained therein, especially if it is the INFALLIBLE word of an INFALLIBLE God.

That is why, increasingly more every day, I am buying into the idea that organized religion as a whole is a very BAD THING. I don't give a damn WHICH religion. They all promote hate and intolerance. I know realistically we will never live on an Earth devoid of religion. For some reason, people are drawn to it like moths to a flame. Just remember, sometimes the moth THINKS it's a flame and it ends up zapping him to dust in a purple whiff of ultraviolence.

I also recognize that violent religious crusades and clashes help our planet maintain its balance by thinning out our numbers. Just as earthquakes, cancer, AIDS, etc. do the same. Everyone can't live forever. Dying is a fact of life, the last fact of life. If we all lived forever, we really WOULD be in danger of stripping our planet bare of its resources. If only there were some way to make sure it was the WICKED who were weeded out. Too often, the ones in power are corrupt and succeed in wiping out vast numbers of the innocent.

I guess the Earth doesn't care who she kills off, just that the numbers have got to be maintained as closely as possible. Just goes to show how cosmically unimportant we all REALLY are. And if THAT doesn't make you want to cling to some hope of cosmic significance, I don't know what will. That's why, deep down, man feels he needs a God who created him for a purpose. But He didn't. Because there isn't.

A horrible news item like so many others

See MY comments at the bottom. If you dare.

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HOUSTON, Texas (AP) -- The stepfather of a 2-year-old girl lost control and beat her to death because she wouldn't say "please" and "yes sir," an attorney for the girl's mother said Wednesday.

A body found last month in Galveston Bay is believed to be that of the little girl, Riley Ann Sawyers, though DNA tests are pending.

Her mother, Kimberly Dawn Trenor, and stepfather, Royce Clyde Zeigler II, were arrested Saturday.

Trenor's attorney, Tommy Stickler Jr., also said Wednesday that Trenor is pregnant.

According to court documents, Trenor, 19, told police she and her husband killed the girl in July and hid her body in a shed before dumping it in the bay.

Stickler said Zeigler, 24, was overwhelmed by his sudden fatherhood and didn't know what behavior to expect from a toddler. Trenor moved with her daughter from Mentor, Ohio, to Texas in June to be with Zeigler, whom she met online.

Zeigler wanted his wife to spank Riley with a belt when she failed to say things like "please" and "yes sir" or "no sir," Stickler said Wednesday. Zeigler didn't believe Trenor was doing it, however, because the 2-year-old's behavior wasn't changing.

The fatal beating happened after Zeigler stayed home from work to make sure his wife was following his discipline plan, Stickler said.

In her statement to Galveston authorities, Trenor said the girl was beaten with leather belts, had her head held underwater in a bathtub and then was thrown across a room, her head slamming into a tile floor.

Although the affidavit said the couple abused Riley over a four- to six-hour period, Stickler said it wasn't a continuous event. Instead, Zeigler grew increasingly enraged as he spanked Riley and she kept forgetting to do things the way he wanted.

"There was never an intention to beat Riley to death," he said.

At one point, Trenor wanted to call an ambulance but Zeigler wouldn't let her, saying they would both be arrested if officials saw her injuries, Stickler said. Instead, Riley was given some over-the-counter pain medication.

When Riley later stopped breathing, Zeigler performed CPR on her tiny body, Stickler said.

Neal Davis III, Zeigler's attorney, said Trenor's story isn't believable.

"She is placing all the blame on Royce, but I think that once the facts come to light, once the timeline's established and the evidence is combed through ... I think her credibility is gonna become a big issue," Davis said.

Trenor and Ziegler were arrested after investigators spent weeks trying to identify the girl they dubbed "Baby Grace," whose body was found in a plastic box floating in Galveston Bay. Riley's paternal grandmother in Ohio had called police, thinking a sketch of the dead child might have been the granddaughter she hadn't seen in months.

Trenor and Zeigler remained jailed Wednesday on charges of injury to a child and tampering with evidence. Bail was set at $350,000 each.
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Okay, "INJURY TO A CHILD" and "TAMPERING WITH EVIDENCE?" Is that the best we can do? How can justice be served for this little girl who was beaten bloody and thrown across the room into a wall if these are the best charges we can come up with?

"Injury to a child?" Excuse me, prosecutor, but is she merely injured or is she fucking DEAD?  Charge them with murder, for crying out loud! I just don't understand all this first-degree, second-degree, premeditated, manslaughter, bullshit jargon mumbo jumbo. A toddler was MURDERED by her stepfather while her mother stood by and let it happen.

"Tampering with evidence?" It's called CONCEALING THE BODY OF A PERSON YOU JUST MURDERED! ...TWICE!!! So after this little girl was killed, all she became was "evidence?" That's almost as sickening as the crime itself.

There is far too much leniency in our legal system. To use a cliché, we should just call a spade a spade and get on with some REAL punishment in this country. I don't need DNA evidence in a case like this. But it'll be there. I don't need a trial. But there will be one. The guy admitted to beating the shit out of a baby! What more evidence and incentive do we need to execute this man? I'm serious. I just don't understand this country sometimes. Here's the complete record of MY trial:

"Mr. Ziegler, you are charged with killing a toddler. Did a toddler die as a result of the harsh beatings you administered?"
"Yes."
"Guilty. Somebody fry this asshole, please. NEXT!"

How can we let people get AWAY with shit like this? He'll probably serve 15 years. How UNBALANCED is that?! What, we should take pity on him because he got overwhelmed and snapped? Should we give him another chance? Maybe we should give him another baby and see how he does. That is BULLSHIT! He's a lowlife scumbag that should be executed painfully!

I know this kind of thing happens all the time, and I'm not going to go off the rails every time I see a news item like this, but DAMMIT! It just makes me ANGRY! My wife and I had to try so HARD to have our two children together, and I love them so much that I can't imagine the coldness it would take to snuff out an innocent life like that. I can sorta understand the mindset it takes to kill an adult that you're angry with, but why are there so many people killing and hurting CHILDREN? I'm almost ashamed I live in a country where shit like this goes more or less unpunished.

And don't even talk to me about Christian forgiveness. It's inhuman to forgive a piece of shit like this. Besides, it's not OUR forgiveness he needs, is it? It's RILEY'S. And she can't forgive him even if she would be inclined to do so, because he KILLED HER!

...Riley, there are some of us who recognize the tragedy that's occurred. What you went through was terrible, unfathomable and unforgivable. Rest in peace, little one. I can only hope you will be rightfully avenged. Hail Riley.

Don't hate on me... Middle-Eastern is the new Black

Okay, don't blame me. I'm just stating a fact. Since 9/11, we have been inundated in this country with the idea that people of Middle-Eastern descent are to be considered suspicious. Every day we hear something about "terrorism." Today I realized that all this prejudicial exposure has made an impact on me.

I claim to not be racist, but to judge people rather based on their deeds and attitudes. YES, I JUDGE PEOPLE! YES, I ADMIT TO IT! But I believe that I do so fairly, not based on their skin color, religion, political affiliation, sexual orientation, etc. However, as a white guy who led a pretty sheltered life, growing up in a small Midwestern town with very little ethnic diversity, I used to get nervous around blacks. Not around one or two, but if the black-to-white ratio in the room or area was too great, I'd be one nervous guy.

It wasn't my fault. It was the intolerant culture in which I was raised. Now I have grown up, forged relationships, had experiences outside my redneck hometown. I don't judge based on skin color alone. I can stop in East St. Louis and ask someone for directions without (too much) fear. I see that people are people. At least I thought so until today.

I ride public transportation. Just doing my part to conserve, both for the environment and for my wallet. So I'm on the city bus this morning and there are probably eight people on the bus at the time. It's about 6:00 am. At one stop, a Middle-Eastern man gets on. He has the lower half of his face covered with a wraparound scarf. He has a hood pulled over his head.

For a split second after I first see him, I get a flash image of one of those infamous beheading videos. I feel uncomfortable for a good minute, even though I know there's no logical reason to. First of all, I'm on a freaking BUS in Peoria, not an international flight to Afghanistan. Second, it's not even a CROWDED bus. If someone were going to hijack or blow up a bus, it wouldn't be one with nine passengers. Third, it's FREAKING COLD! Of course he has his face covered up! He's been waiting outside in the 30-degree darkness waiting for a bus! I know I'm an idiot for being uncomfortable, but I can't help it. I've been conditioned to by my newsmedia and my government, especially over the last six years.

Black men, rejoice! You are no longer public enemy number one. As long as there are tan-skinned people blowing shit up & killing innocent people, you should be pretty safe from public scrutiny. Even if you're a gangbanging punk who plugs a rival gang member every now & then, at least you love your momma and you're not a terrorist.

My 50th MySpace friend KICKS ASS!

Hooray! The father of death metal himself, King Diamond, has accepted my friend request! I am so stoked, you guys. For a long time, some poseur was pretending to be King on MySpace, but that's finally been sorted out & now the King has taken his throne and booted the impostor to the curb where he belongs.

The OFFICIAL MySpace for King Diamond is now run by the one true King. Not run by a label or a fan, but the one and only KING DIAMOND. I'm honored to be on his friend list and eager after 20 years of fandom to finally get the opportunity to see him perform live in April!

There are those bands & musicians that you like and will buy their albums every now & then. There are those you can hear on the radio or Internet radio and say, "Yeah, I like that," but never actually purchase any albums. There are those that you like and might download their entire catalog illegally. There are those you like while you are going through a phase or a mood, which you might forget about for years, then maybe come back to only to forget again a while later.

THEN there are the ones that, since you discover them, become a PART OF YOU. For some reason, these artists make such an impression on you, that you know you will go to your grave humming one of their songs. Their music permeates your soul. It is these artists that shape the lives of their fans in more ways than they can ever know. Their lyrics become part of inside jokes, they inspire poetry they'll never read, they inspire some to begin their own journey into music or some other creative pursuit.

For me, there are three main acts that define this in my life. Electric LightOrchestra, whom I have been a fan of since I first discovered them at about age 8; Manowar, whose "Defender" (FTW version) spoke to me in 1987 like nothing I had ever heard before--I immediately purchased all the albums I could find, joined the fan club, and my lifelong journey with the Kings of Metal began; also in that year I discovered King Diamond. The first KD song I heard was "Abigail." I was intrigued because, once again, I had never heard anything remotely like this, and it was CREEPY AS HELL!

I ran out & bought the Abigail cassette the next day, waited until nightfall, turned out the lights, put on the ol' headphones, and listened to the whole thing, pausing only once to flip the tape over. I was scared shitless by the end of that album. I switched all the lights back on & was too freaked out to sleep for a long time that night. I put the tape away & vowed to never listen to it again because there was something sinister about it.

Then "Them" came out. I heard the first two tracks on the radio the day of the album's release. The DJ instructed me before he played them to turn out the lights for atmosphere. I did so. Once again, the King freaked my shit out. I had tape-recorded the songs as they played, poor reception & all. I listened to them again right then. I was blown away. It was then that I dug out that Abigail tape to give it another listen. What had I been thinking??? This thing was a fucking MASTERPIECE! I ran out the next day and bought "THEM" on cassette. This time I had the added bonus of liner notes & lyrics sheet. Wow. This guy was a freaking genius.

After that night, I sought out old Mercyful Fate albums and vowed to buy each and every King Diamond album from then on. I painted my face and went as vintage King for Halloween that year. He was one of the very few pictures hanging in my locker at school. I was hooked.

The point is, now both the metal bands that helped define who I am are in my friend list. I think that's pretty fucking cool. Hey, guys- Thanks for the last 20 years, and for the back catalog before that. And, of course, all the great shit yet to come. You guys rock! I've only seen Manowar once live, but I hope that King is half as cool as them in person. Manowar was metal enough to hang out after the show for a meet and greet. It was one of the greatest moments of my life, meeting Eric Adams. If I could talk & shake hands with King Diamond, get an autograph, whatever, oh man that would be so awesome. Anyway, enough of me blowing my idols. I'll definitely let everyone know how that show is in April.

And a big thank you, hails and horns to King Diamond, Manowar... oh, and Jeff Lynne, too!

Illinois school prayer plan falls apart

Well that didn't last long, did it? What, four weeks or so? It seems there have been lawsuits filed (like we didn't know THAT was gonna happen) by free-thinking atheists who claim the "Silent Prayer and Reflection Act" is an endorsement of school prayer. A U.S. District judge, Robert Gettleman, has barred the moment of silence in a Chicago-area school district because the law is "too vague." He had no power to do so across the board, but it should be noted that there is no provision for punishment against districts who do not comply with the mandate.

School districts are being warned they should cease following the mandate, or they might inevitably face lawsuits from angry parents who don't want their children being forced to pray in public school. Two state representatives, one a democrat and one a republican, plan to announce today legislation that will strip the mandate from schools.

I think this might turn out as a victory for the secular side of society. If you ask me, it's a given that this mandate is going to be found unconstitutional. So, that means the state will likely revert to the original form of the law, which states educators "may" lead their students in a moment of silence for prayer or silent reflection at the start of every day. But wait a minute. If it's deemed unconstitutional for the state to require schools to participate, won't it be just as unconstitutional for schools to even participate once the law merely gives them "permission" to? If any district lets its teachers continue leading the moment of silence, that district is just BEGGING for lawsuits.

So we'll be back where we started, with the state of Illinois allowing teachers to lead a moment of silence in their classrooms, but everybody too chicken to actually take advantage of the law for fear of losing their job or facing a lawsuit. Why even have such a law? What made the lawmakers think the people were just going to take this kind of thing lying down? There is no purpose in passing laws that are this ridiculous. All they've succeeded in doing is drumming up controversy, pissing people off, further driving a wedge between atheistic and religious parents of children in the same schools, and igniting frivolous lawsuits that could have been avoided altogether.

Let's hope they see the error of their ways and get this law COMPLETELY stricken down as soon as possible, so we can go back to doing what we should be doing in school: TEACHING.